To Be Next...

I have been reading a book over the last few days, and other than just enjoying what I am reading, I don't find that I think much about the books I am reading. There is one line in this book that I just keep thinking about and have gone back to read several times. It pretty much sums up how I feel like I have been living my life lately...

"It is some sort of perfidious human desire to never be where we are, but to be next, to be the next minute forward, to escape the present."

I have especially felt like this with all of the eye problems that occurred with my surgery. I am truly tired of dealing with it and more than anything want to get to the point where I can pretend that nothing ever happened. For those that are wondering and don't already know, I will not be getting my LASIK surgery for now. It does seem that it may happen eventually, but for now it is a no go. Soon I will be in my contacts again and everyone will forget this ever happened.

When was the last time you truly lived in the moment? When was the last time you had a day where you weren't thinking about the next day, or what your schedule was for the next week, or when your next vacation was? I honestly can't remember the last time for me...

My Sweet Little Angel

This is a picture of the Valentine that our son Collin made for us. I am sure every kid did something similar in their classes on Friday, but I thought that I would share this because Collin obviously put a lot of thought into it. It is nice to see that they really do appreciate us. I know the candies on the page are impossible to read so the note reads like this... (I will change the font and the color of the words that are on the candies)

• Happy Valentine's Day mom & dad. Mom you are top chef in the house. Please don't call me lover boy. Only kiss me at bed time. Love you mom. Mom your an angel. Dad I love when you play catch with me. Dad get real. I love your jokes. Your son Collin
  Collin is the sweetest, most compassionate little boy. I am so blessed to have him as a son!

Chad's First Post - My Princess

I am about to get as sappy and open as I am capable, but I can't resist sharing a peek into my own heart.

My first post (EVER!) needs to be about nothing more than my deep love and admiration for Kris. If you follow this blog you have seen the amazing amount of love Kris has for people; her kids, her family, her friends, her patients at the hospital, and even me. We are blessed to be loved by her and better people for it.

• If you have ever tasted her food then you have been blessed. I get to eat it EVERY day!


• If you have ever seen how beautiful she is when she smiles then you have been blessed! I get to see this almost everyday (there is some correlation to sleep with this one)


• If you have ever been encouraged by her loyal friendship, you've been blessed! 13 years and counting!


• If you have ever seen how much she loves her children then you are blessed! Yes, even when she isn't happy with them.


• If you have ever seen Kris care for a patient at work then you have been blessed! Okay, I am going off of her stories which sound legit. =)


• If you have ever been the recipient of a gift from Kris then you have been blessed! Most of the western hemisphere falls into this catagory.


• I could go on...

I love you Kris. I look on our past together as the best years of my life. I look towards our future life together as a gift from God. As for today, well my heart tells me that I am more in love with you than ever.

For the times I have let you down; I am sorry. For the times that I didn't listen; I am sorry. For the times I have forgotten your love for me; I am sorry. For the times I have failed to make you smile; I am sorry. For the times I have taken your love for granted; I am sorry. I want to be the best for you and I will stop at nothing to make that happen.

You are my Princess,

Chad

Love of a Lifetime

With Valentine's Day coming up, I have been reflecting on my relationship with Chad. I realize just how lucky I am to have found my TRUE LOVE so young. So many of our friends were skeptical. They all thought that because we married so young that we would never last. I think Chad and I both knew early on in our relationship that we were meant to be together. So....today's blog is just a quick journey through the 13 years that Chad and I have spent together. The songs that are now on our blog are songs that either have some significance to our relationship or that make me think of Chad. For example the song "For the First Time" is the song Chad and I had our first dance to at our wedding (our first dance ever), "Your Still the One" is a song that was playing when we drove into Arizona for the very first time. The song made me think of how crazy our lives had been until that point and I think that it was the first time I realized that I was growing to love this man that I had married more and more every day. Every time I hear the song "Lucky" I think of how I am truly blessed to have married my very bestfriend. Finally, "Head Over Feet" always makes me think of Chad he has always called me his PRINCESS. I used to listen to this song all the time when we were first dating...

Chad and I met at the University of New Mexico, on campus, with 30,000 other college students. He happened to walk by a bench I was sitting on and that is how it all began.

This is a picture of us at 18 & 20 years old. Chad wasn't sure that he was going to call and ask me out until he heard my last name and realized that we had something we could talk about. That one thing was my brother. Who would have guessed that 9 years after my brother was killed that I would meet someone who knew him and that HE (my brother) would bring us together. We quickly found out that we had gone to all the same schools since kindergarten, but we never met until college.

By our second date, we decided not to see other people. It was only about 3 months later that Chad flew me to Minnesota to meet his sister, and only about a month later that I realized that Chad was in this forever...

One night we were driving home from a date and he randomly started to laugh. When I asked him what he was laughing at he just looked at me and said "I just think it is funny that I am sitting next to my wife". I was shocked that he felt that way so early in our relationship and VERY glad because I felt the same way.

So even after all of these years, we are still going strong. Chad may not be the most romantic guy I have ever met. He doesn't believe in flowers because they die, but he does the things that matter to me the most. He is BY FAR the best at giving back rubs and he gives them to me way more than I deserve (even if he doesn't want to), he makes me laugh more than anyone, and sometimes I think he knows me better than I know myself. I am so happy to be married to him! We now have our two beautiful kids to share our love with, and I hope that if we can't teach them anything else, that they will get to see a good example of what a marriage is supposed to be like from watching me and Chad.This is us as a young family (probably 4 years ago) This is us this past Christmas in Albuquerque, NM where our life started together as a couple.

I LOVE YOU CHAD AND I ALWAYS WILL!!!!

Admiration

Admiration: Ad`mi*ra"tion\, n. [F., fr. L. admiratio. See Admire.]
1. Wonder; astonishment. [Obs.]

2. Wonder mingled with approbation or delight; an emotion excited by a person or thing possessed of wonderful or high excellence; as, admiration of a beautiful woman, of a landscape, of virtue. Every now and then, we meet special people in our lives. I have had the pleasure to meet and to work with Erin B. I have been asked on several occasions throughout my life to tell about someone I admire, and for as long as I can remember I always picked the same person. I was sitting her thinking recently about who I know that I admire the most, and Erin came to mind immediately. I may not know her that well (really just as colleagues), but I can't say enough good things about what I do know. She is an amazing mom, a loving wife, a dedicated nurse who loves what she does, and a woman of faith. She ALWAYS has a smile for everyone. She works nights and lives for her kids. I honestly do not even know how she can function sometimes, but she does and she does it well. I would very much like to be more like her This is for you Erin... You AMAZE me!

Life is FULL of disappointments...

Some are just BIGGER than others!

So, yesterday was the big day. I had my preop appt for my LASIK surgery and after they did the scans of my corneas I was told that I am NOT a canidate for the procedure. This was disappointment #1.

*I do have to clarify that we knew that there was a chance this could happen after the corneal abrasion I suffered while under anesthesia more than 2 weeks ago*
The physician then went on to explain to me that the damage done to my cornea was so severe that she feels that we could check for further healing in 2-4 weeks, but that her recommendation was to wait for 6 months to a YEAR. Disappointment #2

*We thought that if the procedure had to be delayed that it would be by a week or 2*

The physician further went on to explain that, in her professional opinion, there is now a chance that I may NEVER be able to have my LASIK procedure done. Disappointment #3

I WILL be getting another opinion, but in the meantime it looks like I will be wearing my glasses. After being given my bad news, I tried wearing my contacts for 3 hours and after taking them out my left one was painful and inflamed all over again. Disappointment #4Who knew that one could sustain such a bad injury while they were ASLEEP????

My Newest Creation

Well, the other night I thought that I should make dessert. I decided on BROWNIES, because who doesn't love chocolate? For some reason, simple brownies just weren't enough so I made a sort of brownie cake! Here are pictures of it when is was done. It was sprinkled with cut up Reese's Peanut Butter Cups...

Don't worry my work friends... I already bought all the stuff to make it again and when I am back to work I will bring one in YUM!!